Freefall

I don’t know what day it is anymore. Summer started. Every day feels like Sunday; slow start, easy vibes, thoughtful meditation – time for rest recharge. It’s really Sunday today. Isn’t it? Or is that tomorrow?

I am thankful. I am happy. Please show me more.

All year long, this is the dream; days running together, no need for an alarm. But this morning waking up feeling late started the day off in an odd way. Late for what exactly. Life, maybe because today there is no plan. When there is nothing pressing, is that what freedom feels like?

You are right where you need to be in this moment. Trust yourself. I am thankful. I am happy. Please show me more.

I dreamt last night. They say we dream every night, but I only remember mine when I wake up at 3 am – too hot, too thirsty, too mid-life- then fall back asleep from 4 – 7 am. REM cycles are about three hours. This makes sense, because only in that last bit of the night, do I remember dreaming. But I do not remember the dream. Unsettling I imagine based on this Alice-like feeling today.

What’s meant for me will come. What’s meant to leave will go. You are right where you need to be in this moment. Trust yourself. I am thankful. I am happy. Please show me more.

What is the quote I love “We’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad. You must be, or you wouldn’t have come here.” It’s ok to go a bit mad from time to time. Not knowing the day can take one from free to mad quickly. From comfortable and content to unsettled. From taking the day as it comes to I should be doing something more. The restraint of running on bells and schedules runs deep. Conditioning takes more than a month to unlearn. Live in the present, not the past nor the future. That is where peace is found.

Give yourself grace. It’s in the discomfort that we grow. What’s meant for me will come. What’s meant to leave will go. You are right where you need to be in this moment. Trust yourself. I am thankful. I am happy. Please show me more.

Addie LaRue was granted a life of freedom. A life to live as she chooses, the ultimate wish granted. Living life at your own pace, where everyday is a Sunday. In return, Addie was forgotten, all memories of her erased. A living ghost. Is that what freedom looks like, being bound to nothing and no one? Time becomes irrelevant? So then it really makes no difference if today is Tuesday, or Friday, or Sunday. So why do I care?

Let go of things that don’t serve you. Give yourself grace. It’s in the discomfort that we grow. What’s meant for me will come. What’s meant to leave will go. You are right where you need to be in the moment. Trust yourself. I am thankful. I am happy. Please show me more.